Source of Strenght
by Izzyliji
Summary: Edward and Bella have a fight and Bella goes to the forest to cool down. There she gets an unexpected friend when she meets a wolf. Sry for bad summary. Mild cursing, no other warnings. B/P
1. My Silent Source of Strenght

**Hello there.**

**So this was just an idea I came up with a awhile ago and because I know that whenever I try to write a chapter story, I won't finish it and then I end up removing them. So I made a One-Shot! Now I don't have to worry about never finishing this because it's already finished! :)**

**IMPORTANT BACKGROUND KNOWLEDGE:**

**So Bella doesn't know about the La Push wolf pack. The Cullens are vampires and the pack exists but Bella just had no knowledge about them. Jacob phased a bit later in this story than in New Moon. Bella has never met Paul. Edward did leave but didn't try to commit suicide but just came back instead. **

**That should be all the important stuff I guess...**

**Enjoy!**

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**My Silent Source of Strenght **

Bella walked the rocky forest path, fuming. She couldn't in her right mind understand how Edward thought that he could control everything she said or did. She was her own person, God-dammit, and she was perfectly capable of making her own decisions, even if they turned out to be mistakes.

She was a human, wasn't she? Making mistakes was part of the whole growing process of humans or whatever.

So she didn't need Edward telling her how to act or who to talk to or how to talk to someone. And she certainly didn't need him to tell her how 'indecent' Mikes thoughts of her were. He was a normal teen age boy, she was bound to have 'indecent' thoughts. As long as Mike didn't act upon those thoughts, they were fine.

But while she accepted and understood those thoughts, Edward didn't need to tell her about them in detail, thank you very much.

Suddenly Bellas foot caught in a root and she was face first in the muddy forest ground and curses fell from her lips._ Can't I have a break?!_

She stood up and started walking again. She didn't really have any destination, she just walked for the sake of getting away from the freaking Cullens.

Edward had been really nice and prince-like the first time she had met him but the more she spent time with him, the more she seemed to be consumed by him - in a bad way. Before she noticed what had happened, he had isolated her from every other people but the Cullens.

Suddenly Edward would start telling her what she should eat, what foods were unhealthy for her and what were healthy. Then he would start planning exercises for her and then the music she was listening was bad. The list went on and on, but the worst thing was that she had let him. She had let him do it when she made no move to stop him or even argue on her point.

Edward was a true Victorian guy. He thought that women should be quiet and obedient. Something she definitely was not but played to be because she loved him - she truly did.

But this just couldn't continue.

Carlisle was too blinded by Edwards charm to see that he truly was suffocating her - Edward was Carlisles first 'son'. In other words Edward was so fucking _perfect _that he couldn't be wrong. So Bella would have to help herself - which was no surprise since she had done so since she could remember.

Then there was dear Alice, the shopping freak. The one who would drag here shopping at least twice a week. Bella just couldn't understand the pull and Alice didn't seem to understand that Bella truly did hate shopping!

Despite Alice's opinion, Bella did care how she looked but she didn't need millions of different clothes to look good. She didn't need nor want to put many layers of make-up to 'look amazing'. And she certainly didn't need to spend hundreds of dollars on clothes every week!

And to put it simply, Alice didn't either care or know what Bella preferred to wear. She wasn't really girly, she didn't like skirts or dresses. Bella wore jeans. But that didn't mean she looked ugly or boring wearing them, God-dammit.

And Bella honestly thought that the other Cullens had noticed all of this but they just didn't care. Rosalie could probably care less what happened to the 'poor human' and Jasper was most likely glad that Alice had found something to do. Emmet just seemed too stupid to realize anything and Esme went with everything her dear husband said.

Truly, they were one messed up family.

Bellas thought were so keenly on the Cullen family that she didn't stop to look at her surroundings. She just kept walking. But when she finally did notice that the forest was thicker and darker, she stopped. She wasn't really all that surprised to see that she didn't recognize anything she saw. Se was lost.

But it didn't mean that she was happy about it. Definitely not, it only managed to make her more mad and miserable.

"Great, this is just what I need. To get lost in the fucking forest", she muttered to herself.

Bella didn't usually curse but she was just so pissed at the moment that she didn't care. Who was listening to her anyway? She was alone, lost in the forest.

Not good.

_And I'm still pissed..._

Bella had a sudden strong urge to just scream at the top of her lungs but she held it down. There were many dangers in the forest and though they all weren't supernatural, she didn't want to attract attention to herself by screaming like a crazy person.

A sudden stay of light caught her eye on her left. When she turned towards it, she saw what seemed to be some kind of field. Bella started walking towards it with hurried steps.

She hated the dark and the forest was dark. She was glad to get out of there so she didn't really watch where she was going. It wasn't a big surprise that just when she reached the field, she tripped - again.

Tears of frustration welled up in her eyes and she punched the ground with her fist. She was just so _tired_. She was tired of Edwards controlling ways, she was tired of Alices so called 'fun shopping-sprees' and she was tired of always tripping on her own two feet!

But most of all, she was tired of always pretending to be what she wasn't. She wasn't some meek girl who got pushed around. She was stubborn and had a strong will that she had allowed Edward to suppress this long only because she loved him.

_She was tired of it all!_

The Cullens should just shove their vampiric asses to hell!

Maybe if she told him all that, he would listen? Edward loved her too, didn't he? So space and the permission to do her own decision shouldn't be too much to ask... Right?

And there it was again - permission. She shouldn't even be _asking_ permission to make her own decisions, she should just _start making them_! What was wrong with her?

Bella hadn't gotten up from the ground when she had tripped, she just laid there on her stomach, her head on her forearms, eyes closed, though the tears had ceased. She was so caught up in her own musings that she didn't notice that the field had now another visitor.

When Bella felt something cold and wet on her cheek and temple, she let out a startled yelp and sat quickly up.

She froze when she realized that she was almost nose to nose with a silver wolf. She stared into its yellow-golden eyes, but took quick notice that the wolf was big - no - huge. The wolf had to bow her head to be face to face whit her.

It was the size of a horse!

Bella was terrified. She knew that one should never run from a predator so instead, she tried to slowly crawl backwards while her butt was still on the ground and hands supported her. The wolf only cocked its head a little and followed her.

_Okay, so this wasn't working_.

Bella stopped moving and took several deep breaths while telling herself that there was no reason to panic. The wolf hadn't shown any aggressive behavior - at least yet. It only seemed curious. So it was probably safe to say that it wasn't planning to eat her.

Only the wolf didn't stop when Bella did. It kept coming towards her and Bella had to lean back. Eventually she was leaning so much backwards that she fell on her back. She clenched her hand together on top of her chest, so she wouldn't do something she would regret - like try to push the wolf.

The wolf came on top of her. First it just stared at her for a while but then it bent forward to sniff at her.

And apparently it didn't like what it smelled, because it pulled its lip to show a perfect set of white teeth and growled.

_Oh god.._. Bella thought while clenching her eyes shut. She didn't want to see when it are her.

Then the wolf put it gigantic paw on her stomach - oh god it covered her whole stomach with ease - and Bella jumped slightly.

It's gonna crush me!

Bella was already ready to say goodbyes to her loved ones when the most amazing thing ever - on Bellas opinion - happened. The wolf started to rub its paw on her gently.

Bella opened her eyes slowly, first the other one - as if afraid that a sudden explosion would happen - and finally the other one.

The wolf wasn't looking at her face, no, it stared at the paw that was rubbing her stomach. It stopped its act for a moment to sniff her again. It didn't seem satisfied - with what, she didn't know - for it pulled its upper lip in a silent snarl, but still pulled the paw from her body and put it beside her.

Then the wolf practically laid on top of her, but seemed to be careful not to put its whole body weight on her.

Bella freaked, she felt so trapped when she couldn't even move her hands for they too were under the wolf. She tried to crawl away from the wolf but it gave a low growl - for warning, she knew - and Bella stilled. The wolf started to rub its head on whatever was not covered under its body, including Bellas face.

But Bella knew enough about canine animals to know that this was an affectionate gesture, not a dangerous one. So she just laid there silently, letting the wolf do what it wanted.

It almost seemed like it was trying to cover her in its scent, which was crazy. Wolfs generally stayed away from humans but when the two species did meet occasionally, wolves definitely did not react like this.

She wasn't this wolfs pack, so there was no reason to have its scent on her. But wolves relied on instinct, so something woke up the instinct to cover her scent in its, but what - she didn't know.

Bella was rudely interrupted from her musing when she felt a rough tongue on her face, and a second later, half her face was covered in drool.

"Oh, ew. _Eww_!" Bella groaned and tried to get her hands free to get the drool off of her face.

And that's when Bella suspected that she had gone crazy, because she could have sworn that the wolf smirked at her. Bella shook her head mentally and pushed the crazy thought away. Surely the stress was just getting on her and she was seeing things.

The wolf had gotten up and moved to her side, but Bella didn't know if it was a good idea to get up yet so she just stayed on her back, and started to rub her face on her hoodie to get the drool off.

While she cleaned her face, she also took time to study the wolf a bit. Its whole body was different shades of silver except for the dark muzzle and black tipped tail. And while Bella wasn't all that familiar with wolves, she was sure that this one was exceptionally muscled.

And way too big to be normal. There was just no way that wolfs were of this size. She briefly considered that this wolf too was something supernatural, but shook the idea off almost at once. This is only an oddity. Everything odd isn't always supernatural, she scolded herself.

_The other half of the Quileute legends Jacob had told her hadn't even crossed her mind._

She took a quick peek under its belly and blushed a bit. Definitely male. She couldn't phantom why she was blushing - it was an animal for gods sake! - but it seemed wrong to peek at him like that. However animal he was.

She didn't see how the wolfs smirk had only grown and how his eyes sparkled, because she wasn't looking at his face.

Bella - again - was in deep thought about the wolf when he suddenly bent forward to sniff at her neck. Bella did what her remaining human instinct told her to do and tilted her head to show her neck fully to him. The wolf nipped at it lightly. Bella froze and let out a whine. The wolf then licked at her neck and pulled away.

Bella took that as a sign that she had _finally_ done something right.

The wolf - Silvery, Bella decided to call him - started nudging her softly, clearly wanting something.

Bella was at loss when he just continued to do so, but apparently getting impatient when she just lied there because he started growling softly. So Bella decided to try and get up and sat up slowly, to see what his reaction would be.

Silvery only watched her when she sat up but when she stopped there to look at him, he started the nudging again, this time a bit more forcefully.

"Okay, okay!" Bella said and stood up. Silvery circled and studied her - never breaking contact with her - almost as if inspecting her. Bella only stood there, not knowing what to do.

She took notice however, that Silverys back was on the same height as her chest. This is one gigantic wolf.

When Silvery was done, he stepped away from her, laid on the ground and closed his eyes. Bella waited five seconds before deciding that she was safe and started to walk back to where she came from, back to home.

Before she even got to the tree line, however, Silvery was in front of her. He pushed her once back towards the centre of the field. It was a light push so Bella stood her ground. Silvery watched her closely before shaking his head upwards.

"I'm supposed to stay _here_?" Bella asked in disbelief. Silvery nodded his huge head and Bella let out a small cry.

"For how long?" She exclaimed. Silverys only answer was another push, this time a bit more forceful so she stumbled backwards a bit. She didn't fall, but she did get the message; _Start moving._

She turned and walked on the centre of the field, Silvery following her, and stopped there. Silvery laid down again and pulled her down on her hoodies sleeve with his teeth. He seemed careful to not bite her. She leaned on his side and Silvery curled around her. Her hand automatically went to his head that was practically on her lap.

Silvery seemed to be sleeping, but Bella knew better already. Though he seemed relaxed, he was tense, and though his eyes were closed, his ears twitched now and then. Silvery was very alert and was sure to know everything that was going around him.

And maybe it was good that at least one of them was, because Bella on her part was in denial. She couldn't believe that these things happened to her of all people. She was being held captive by a wolf of all things!

_Danger-magnet 'till do us apart..._ She thought bitterly.

She absentmindedly started to rub Silvery behind his ears and he let out a purr like growl. She took that as a good sign.

Silence filled the field and Bella, not used to being silent, became nervous and started fidgeting. She desperately needed to talk or at least do something.

"So..." She started nervously. Silvery glanced at her before closing his eyes again. "I decided to call you Silvery".

That got his attention. He lifted his head before doing what seemed to be a scowl. And because she lost contact with those ears of his, she pulled his fluffy tail to her lap and started to pet it instead. He didn't seem to mind.

"Don't look at me like that" Bella scowled and decided then and there that she was becoming too comfortable with this wolf if she could already talk this rudely to him. "I don't know your name and I didn't want to keep calling you 'wolf this' and 'wolf that'. So I had to pick you a name, and though it's not very original, Silvery is a good name".

Silvery pulled his ears flat on his head and seemed to glare at him. Bella took that as a sign that he disagreed.

"Would you rather be called something like Wolfy? Or Max? Or, hey I know, Fluffy? Yes, that's a great name, I'll call you Fluffy!" Bella said with a clear humor in her voice.

Silvery - ahem, _Fluffy_ \- actually seemed horrified and shook his head furiously.

"See? Silvery isn't such a bad name after all", Bella laughed while bringing his tail to her face and nuzzling it to her cheek. It was so soft! Bella thought gleefully.

Silvery huffed at her and laid his head down again, but this time away from her reach. He seemed to be sulking. Bella laughed silently.

"Please don't be like that. I love your ears and most of all your fur. Please come here?" Bella pleaded while reaching towards his face like a small child. But that was her personality, and who really was even here to witness it?

Silvery seemed to grumble but humored her and brought his head to her hands. Bella smiled brightly and nuzzled her cheek to the side of his face, trying to mimic the carnal sign of affection. Then she kissed his muzzle and he, in turn, licked her nose. Bella giggled lightly.

Bella had always been more on the childish side than mature. But when she met Edward and had a crush on first sight, she was sure that Edwards type was more mature women. So she googled mature, researched it, acted like it, and tried to become more mature than she truly was.

But right now she didn't have to pretend. Right here and to this wolf she could be herself and as childish as she wanted and it was exhilarating and freeing. She felt light and happy.

And Bella felt safe under Silverys watchful eye and him curled around her. Safe, warm and loved. She smiled.

_I don't even mind anymore even if I would get abducted by this wolf_, Bella thought while petting Silverys head.

Wolves lived in packs. And if Silvery really considered Bella as a part of his pack, She was safe, as long as she respected Silvery as her alpha. But she didn't know how. She knew about submitting, of course, because that was what she had done a while ago when Silvery had her on her back. She showed her neck and Silvery accepted the gesture by licking it. That was all she knew. So she just decided to go with her long buried instinct.

The silence was still deafening so she decided to just talk about something. Silvery seemed like he truly understood what she was saying so she didn't feel like a complete idiot when she talked to him.

"You know, I have a boyfriend back home", Bella started. _Of course this is the topic you'll talk about_, she sighed to herself, but continued. "He's handsome and polite and generally every girls dream guy".

Bella kept petting Silvery, but only looked at the ground, even when she heard the soft growl he let out.

"Well at least I thought so for awhile", Bella continued sadly. Silverys twitching ears was the only sign that he was listening to what she told him. "He has proved himself to be controlling, overprotective, manipulative, close minded jerk", Bella said angrily and Silvery did just what she needed him to do - he silently listened to her ranting.

"I mean, it's like I can't have any other friends than he and his family. He isolates me from everyone and I have no power to stop it! Or maybe I do but I'm just afraid. Or, I don't know, I can't! I do love him, I love him so much, but I'm so tired of his ways and how he treats me! I can't even be like myself around him because his always like 'that isn't proper lady behavior, love' or 'remember to watch your language, love'. I'm not a proper lady! I like to jump in mud puddles with my bare feet when it raining or eat pizzas and I do curse occasionally! I'm childish with child like dreams and his trying to make me something else. I don't even recognize myself around him sometimes!" Bella was crying at this point, clutching his neck fur on one of her hands tightly.

Silvery was trying to console her by growling that purr like growl and rubbing his muzzle on her stomach affectionately. She relaxed slightly but continued to cry. She hugged him and continued her little rant. She needed to get this all once and for all out.

"He only gives me couple of pecks now and then but nothing major. We've been together over two years and everything that is even close - even hints - to sex, is out of the question. I feel so worthless and ugly every time he rejects me. Unwanted and all that shit. But I'm still stupid enough to continue trying.

"He left me once, you know? He left me in a forest telling me that I wasn't good enough for him, that I was nothing but a distraction to him and his family. And he truly made me feel like trash, something to be tossed aside when used. And I was a wreck. I selfishly only thought about myself and made Charlie worry so much..." Bella whispered brokenly. She was still crying but they were only silent tears streaming down her face. Silvery was doing the purr growl through her whole story.

"And then I made a friend out of Jacob. We quickly became best friends and though I knew he had crush on me, I wasn't ready to try anything more serious. So we stayed friends for awhile. She taught me how to ride a motorcycle and we cliff jumped. We had fun and he became like my sun. The. After six months of being friends I agreed to try start dating him. Everything went great, for a week. Then Edward came on my doorstep saying how he made a mistake, that he lied, he did love me and begged me take him back. And I foolishly did and broke up with Jacob... (A/N: okay, so in this story Jacob only phased after Bella broke up with him so she could be with Edward)

"Naturally, Jacob was mad at me. He didn't return my calls and every time I tried to drive there meet him something would happen. My car would be broken or Alice would come over or Esme needed help or something. I realized too late that it was all Edwards doing... I confronted him on the subject and he only said that I couldn't go there because he couldn't. That was when I realized how controlling and overprotective he was. He wanted to own me, but only the changed me. Not really me.

"So I do love him... I really do, but not nearly as much as I used to but apparently too much to leave him..." Bella ended that rant there. That was basically it. The only thing left unsaid was that Edward and his family were vampires. But she had the tingling suspicion that Silvery already knew that.

Silvery whined softly when and Bella turned her eyes to his. His yellow-golden eyes stared at him and he licked her hand delicately. Bella smiled a tearful smile and hugged his neck tightly.

"I really like you Silvery. I don't know how or why, but I really do", Bella said truthfully. This was an odd friendship to say the least, but she truly felt that she could trust him with her everything. Her words and her safety.

Silvery made a sound of agreement and rubbed the side of his face everywhere he could reach, since Bella had such a tight grip on him.

Bella then gathered herself together, wiped her tears on her sleeves and looked at him again. " I really should break up with him, huh?"

Silvery nodded once and rubbed their noses together. She giggled happily and did the same before kissing his snout. He gave him a very drool-full kiss on the face and Bella gave a playful cry of outrage. Her face was almost dripping with drool.

"_Ew_, Silvery! Bad _dog_!" Bella exclaimed while cleaning her face on her hoodie - again. She froze, however, when she realized what she had said. She turned to look at him and he had this predatory look in his eyes, playful smirk on his lips.

"Ehehe... _Wolf_. Good _wolf_", she tried but Silvery had already uncurled from around him and was clearly ready to pounce. His eyes told a clear message.

_Run_.

Bella squealed and took off. She ran as fast as she could around the green field and she could hear the thumping sound of Silverys paws touched the ground as he chased her.

Bella wasn't stupid. She knew that Silvery could have caught her many times already. He had let her run as long as she had. But Bella didn't mind, she was having fun! A real fun, not the 'fun' shopping-sprees or 'fun' piano lessons or 'fun' 'let's throw Bella to the roof and laugh'.

Bella squealed again when she felt Silvery on her back. He had literally jumped on her. They fell to the ground and rolled awhile though Silvery took most of the hit since he had curled around her again.

Bella laid there almost on top of Silvery in stunned silence. His front paws were around her as she stared at the sky.

And then she started laughing. She laughed and laughed so much that she was almost out of oxygen when she stopped. Then she started crying again.

"That's almost the most fun I've had in years. How depressing is that?" She gave a sad and teary laugh. "I really need to let him go, don't I? At least for my own sake. I can't keep going on like this", she sighed.

Silvery laid his head text to hers but didn't make a sound. Somehow this wolf had become her source of strength, her silent supporter.

Bella looked around her and noticed that it was almost dark. She had been here for hours. She sighed and snuggled back to her wolfs heat. So warm, she thought with a small smile.

But it was time to bring back a subject they both had grown to hate.

"You know, I have to go home soon." Bella said while stroking Silverys soft, silver fur. He let out a low growl that was a clear negative;_ you're not going anywhere._

"I have a father that is a police chief. He's gonna come looking for me eventually. And it's getting dark. I didn't tell him I was going anywhere and I don't have my phone with me, he must be worried sick already", Bella reasoned.

Silvery didn't say anything, he didn't even look at her and that made Bella sad. She'd come to love those eyes.

"And remember the boyfriend I told you about? He's a vampire so he's bound to find me at some point and then we're both in trouble", Bella said sadly. She didn't want anything to happen to this beautiful silver wolf. And Edward being the overprotective guy he was, was bound to kill Silvery.

"I don't want anything to happen to you", she whispered.

Silvery closed his eyes and sighed. They both were quiet for a while, Bella stroking his ears softly, trying to memorize the texture. Then Silvery untangled himself from Bella, got up and gave his custom nudge to get Bella standing too. Bella briefly wondered what he was up to, but complied. When she was standing, Silvery lied back on his belly and watched her.

When Bella took a step back, Silvery crawled back to her and glanced at his back.

"You want me to ride you?" Bella asked, doubt in her voice. Silvery nodded.

"You'll take me home?" Bella asked, hoping but still with sadness in her voice. She truly didn't want part with her little - ahem, big - alpha wolf, but she knew she had to go home, for once not because of Edward, but because of her father.

Silvery watched her silently before breaking eye-contact and giving a small nod. He seemed to just as sad as she was.

So she walked to his side and put one of her legs on his other side so she was sitting on his back. She tried to get a comfortable position for both of them and when she finally succeeded, she grabbed two handfuls of his neck fur. When she stilled, Silvery took that as sign to get up. So he stood slowly and when he was standing fully, he looked at her questionably.

"Okay. Yes. I'm ready", Bella said but she didn't know which she was trying to convince; Silvery or herself.

_This is bound to get interesting._

Silvery grinned and took off.

The speed was no where near as fast as Edwards piggyback, but it was still fast. Though Silvery obviously wasn't going full speed because he felt so relaxed. Bella buried her face in Silverys fur and hugged his neck tightly so she wouldn't fall off.

The journey lasted about twenty minutes before Silvery stopped. Bella lifted her face from the fur and slid off his back. They were on a very familiar forest path. She suddenly started to consider to just live in the forest with her wolf, her Silvery. To hell with everybody else.

But she couldn't, and wouldn't.

She turned to Silvery once again. He was watching her silently, but sadly. Bella didn't know if animals could cry, but almost seemed like he would soon. She could almost hear her own heart breaking.

She took his face in her hands and spoke strongly: "wolves are proud animals. You should never look like this. Of course you're allowed to be sad. You should feel sadness and happiness and so on. But you should never cry for someone like me."

Bella had her own tears in her eyes, which she refused to shed.

"Maybe we'll see each other again?" She asked, voice full of hope. She truly wished to see her wolf once more, one day, but she didn't know if it was a good idea. Wild wolf that he was.

_Or so she believed._

Silvery looked at her silently, not letting out a sound. Not a nod of agreement or head shake of denial.

A maybe then, she thought sadly.

"Okay. I hope I'll see you some day again", Bella said while casting her eyes down to look at the forest ground and dropped her hand from his sort fur.

Silvery nudged her head back up with his nose so she lifted her head so she could meet those beautiful yellow eyes for the last time. He gave her a soft lick on her cheek and pushed her lightly towards her house.

Bella gave him one last hug, whispering a soft goodbye in his twitching ear, before turning around and walking to her house.

She heard a soft 'bye bye' said back to her but when she turned around, no one was there, not even her silver wolf, so she just decided that she imagined and went inside her house.

She hadn't even closed the door fully when Charlie was already on her.

"Where the heck have you been?! I've been worried sick! And I tried calling you! When you didn't answer I was ready to call every freaking person in this town to look for you! Can't you-" I had to cut him off, otherwise he would have continued his rant the rest of the evening.

"Dad! Dad! Relax, me and Edward had fight and I had to cool down so I went for a walk. I forgot my phone home so I couldn't have answered it. And well, then I kinda got lost", Bella explained. She didn't know if she should tell Charlie about Silvery.

"You got lost? Well how did you get here then, because you obviously wouldn't have if you're here", Charlie asked.

That's when Bella decided that no matter how insane she sounded, she would tell him about Silvery.

"I met a wolf", Bella said, smiling.

"A wolf? Are you okay" Charlie exclaimed.

"Yes, of course. He was nice. He showed me the way back here. He walked with me back here", Bella said.

Charlie watched a in disbelief at her daughter. Surely she was just trying to fool him? Though she seemed to truly believe her own words.

"Maybe you should just go to bed. You seem very tired", Charlie said in fake calmness.

Bella laughed softly. Her dad obviously thought her to have seen things, maybe even that she had gone crazy, so she just agreed and walked upstairs. She took a quick shower and went to bed.

She heard a long sad howl outside that tormented her in her sleep.

* * *

When she woke up she made a decision.

Today, when Edward comes to pick me up, I'll break up with.

After that had been a blur. She dressed, ate and went outside to wait for the familiar silver Volvo that Edward rode. Sure enough, not five minutes after she closed and locked the door, Edward arrived to her yard.

Like many other times, Edward gracefully jumped out of his car and greeted her with a kiss on her cheek then she took her hand and led her to the passenger seat. She pulled her hand from his and then he turned to go to the drivers seat.

"Edward", Bella called out before her nerves decided that she should just chicken this one out, like every other time.

"Yes, love?" Edward asked when he turned to her with a smile on his face. Why oh why was he smiling and looking oh so charmingly handsome? This would be so much easier if he was rude and ugly and generally full of bad things.

Remember Bella, he's a control freak. You can't practically be yourself with him, she reminded herself. You don't even really enjoy your time with him!

She was a wreck. Her hands shook and sweated. Her legs were two seconds from giving out and she felt light-headed.

"I-", she started but didn't finish. Edward looked at her questionably and she was just about to tell him it was nothing when she saw a flash of silver on her left in the forest.

She turned towards the forest, but couldn't see anything anymore. She smiled. Silvery had noticed that she was having difficulties and decided to encourage her again. She truly was her silent source of strength.

"Bella?" Edwards voice broke through her thoughts.

Bella took a deep breath._ This was it._

"Edward. Let's break up.

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**So... Liked it? Hated it?**

**If this story is liked and I get lots of reviews and lots of favourites, I might make a 'sequel' kind of thing or just the same story in Pauls POV.**

**Hope you review and thanks for reading :)**


	2. My Secret Source of Strenght

**Hey,**

**So here is half of the second and last chapter of this story. I realized that the chapter was getting a bit longer than I had originally planned so I decided to post half of it now and write the other half later. I have the whole plot all figured out so I just have to write it anymore.**

**Hope you like this and please review! **

* * *

It has been two months since Bella broke up with Edward. He has continued to pester her about it, calling how he still loves her and is sure that She love him too. And Bella knows his right, she does still love him. But she also finally realized that he is not good for her.

She wouldn't make herself miserable just to make him happy. Not anymore.

In school he would just talk to him like nothing happened and try to hold her hand, though she always managed to pull her hand away. The first time that happened Bella was just so stunned that she couldn't say anything and when she got home she decided that he was just confused. Edward did explain that vampires were stuck to the way they were changed in so maybe his '_superior_' brain just couldn't adapt to the information that he had been dumped.

So when the next day Edward came to talk to her in school, asking how she was and still calling her love, she boldly asked what the hell he was playing, she had broken up with him. Edward said then that he didn't believe that she was serious, that this was just her way of testing him and that he would allow it as long as it didn't take too long.

Bella was so dumbfounded that she couldn't figure out what to say. So Edward just kissed her cheek, said that they both should go to class and took her hand to lead her to there. She was still too stunned to argue so she just let him do it while she gathered her thoughts.

_He's a complete idiot!_ She decided. _So stupid that it's not even funny!_

After that lesson she sought it Edward again to correct his thoughts on the matter, the sooner the better. When she found him she told him that he was wrong. He broke up with him. Explained that while she did love him, she didn't appreciate his constant effort to change her. He seemed to finally get it in his head, but his reaction to the news were something she did not expect.

He grabbed her hand painfully and told her that she was his. He would not let her go, since they loved each other. Jasper came to her rescue when he pulled Edward from her and almost dragged him outside, all the while telling Bella that she was fine now.

But Bella still remembered Edwards crazed eyes and she had a feeling that she had only just then met Edward Cullen. She was far from fine, because she finally realized that Edward was not a human like he pretended to be.

But She still held her ground, because Bella didn't break up with Edward because she didn't love him anymore. She broke up with him because she was sure that Edward was the one who didn't love her. If he was trying to change her into something she wasn't, he did not love her. He should find a woman who was something like he was trying to change her into.

Alice would still ask her to go shopping with her but after the first time she went with her after the break up, she knew better. Alice would only tell how great Edward was at everything, how _gorgeous_ he was, that if she didn't have her 'Jazzy' she would definitely go for Edward and what huge mistake Bella made when she broke up with him.

She was tired of listening to that crap so after that shopping trip, Bella refused to be alone with Alice in anywhere, especially in the mall.

Even Carlisle and Esme came to ask why she would break up with such a golden boy. Bella only said that he wasn't for her and that she was sure he would find his happy ending with someone other than her.

The only ones that didn't question Bellas choice were Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie.

Sometimes this situation could be compared to war, and there were 'Bellas side' and 'Edwards side'. Alice, Carlisle and Esme were on Edwards side while Emmett and, surprisingly enough, Rosalie were on her side. Jasper had clearly decided to take no part in this 'war' out in the open. When they were once alone, however, he said to her that he thinks she has the right to break up with whoever the hell she wants, and that she shouldn't listen to anyone who bitches about her choice.

He also said that 'he was glad that she finally decided to fucking grow a pair and break up with the fucking papas boy'. His words, not hers.

_Jasper doesn't seem to like Edward all that much_, she mused to herself.

So Jasper was like a silent supporter that gave advice and courage to her when she was almost giving up and just about to take him back if only for the sake that all of this pestering would stop.

Almost like her wolf. And only almost, become while Jasper was like her rock, Silvery was her crag; unmovable and faithful.

Speaking was Silvery, Bella thought sadly. She hadn't seen him again. Not after the small flash when she broke up with Edward. She had heard howling many times in the forest but and she could swear that she could recognize the ones that belonged to Silvery, so every time she heard him howl she would whip his head towards the forest and look if she could catch him with her eyes. But no, she had never such luck.

Bella also walked in the forest more often than ever in hopes of meeting him again. She knew that if Silvery didn't want to see her, he could easily avoid her and stay hidden from view, and when or if he wanted to see her again, he knew where to find her, so he would come and find her. But while she knew all this, she just wanted to see him, maybe catch a slight glimpse. She was just desperate, so she wasn't really listening to her voice of reason.

She lived on the hope that she would some day see him again. Maybe even talk to him. She knew that that kind of hope was dangerous because you can only be disappointed if you hope. And Silvery didn't promise to see her again, so it wasn't a certainty.

Bella missed him. And she hoped that wherever Silvery were, he missed her too.

But now she had this Cullen problem, so maybe it was a good thing that Silvery hadn't come to meet her. She needed to end this ridiculousness before she could do anything else.

And when that problem was taken care of, she would go to La Push to try and fix things with Jacob. Bella missed him, too, and she wanted her best friend back. She didn't know if he had still had a crush on her, but either way, she wouldn't try anything more with him anymore, he needed somebody he could trust. Bella had betrayed him once already so he would always have doubts about her now if they would try the couple thing again.

If she hadn't met Silvery at least once in the length of that time, she would go to the woods and look for him. Maybe she could even back her packs and stay in the woods, let's say a week, trying to find her furry friend. But only after these Cullen and Jacob problems, which could take months if Lady Luck wasn't on her side. And she never really was.

"I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world

Life in plastic, it's fantastic!

You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere

Imagination, life is..."

Emmett had messed with her phone, _again_! She thought angrily as she pulled her phone from her back pocket. She checked the caller and frowned.

Rosalie. What could she possibly want from her? I didn't even know I had her phone number, she thought in amazement. She decided to still answer it, she had no reason to ignore it anyway because Rosalie had been nicer to Bella after she broke up with Edward. She had found out a bit earlier that Rosalie didn't fancy the idea that Bella would give up her human life to become a vampire. She still didn't quite understand that, because it was ultimately Bella's decision.

"Hello?" Bella greeted when she answered the phone.

"Hello, love", a voice answered her.

_Okay, this is definitely not Rosalie... _She thought as she rubbed the prick of her nose and squeezed her eyes shut in annoyance.

"Edward. What are you doing with Rosalie's phone?" Bella asked, trying to act calmly.

"Well, love, you wouldn't answer my calls. I did try calling with Alice's phone, but when you wouldn't answer calls from her either, I decided to use someone else's phone. Rosalie's phone was just easiest to take", Edward answered like there was nothing wrong with what he did.

_I feel as if I'm dealing with a child!_ Bella screamed in her head. She felt like ripping her own hair out, she was so frustrated.

Edward calls her at least ten times a day. At first she had answered him but when he just continued to repeat the same things, she started to ignore them. Alice called her rarely but Bella hadn't answered her calls from the beginning. This was the first time, however, when Edward would use someone else's phone to call her.

"Okay, Edward, firstly; do not call me love. I've already told that to you and I know that you heard me with those prefect vampire ears of yours and I know that your perfect vampire brain could process the words, so please listen to me. And secondly, give Rosalie back her phone. There is a good reason why I don't answer your calls anymore and that reason is that _I don't want to talk to you_. So please stop trying to call me and give Rosalie back her phone", she explained to him with the same voice he used on her when he would explain something to her. Like to a child, which he truly seemed to be.

"Don't use that tone with me, Isabella", Edward said disapprovingly.

_Don't use that tone with me, Isabella_, she mock mimicked him in her head. _Fuck you_.

"I'm hanging up now", Bella said cheerily.

"No, love, wait..."

"Bye bye", she said with a sing-song voice. She hung up the phone and threw it on her bed, letting out a long sigh and fell on her bed with a thud. She stared at her ceiling and let her mind wander. She couldn't believe what kind of turn her life had taken only a month ago. No - not a month ago, her life turned upside-down the moment her plane landed on Forks. She thought that she was living every girls dream when she started dating Edward but she had been so naive. She had been in danger every second of the day, and while she knew that she hadn't truly realized it. And Edward wasn't every girls dream guy when you got to know him...

Bella's phone started to play that idiotic song again and Edward's name flashed in the screen. Well at least he was using his own phone now, she thought as she pushed the decline call button. Then she proceeded to change her ring tone to Daniel Powter's 'Bad day'. She had always loved that song. Hopefully Emmett would leave her phone alone now.

Edward kept calling her. She answered her phone, told him to stop calling her and hung it up again. No other words were said.

Why could't Edward just leave her alone? It wasn't as if Bella was anything special, not really. She was sure that there were hundreds if not thousands girls out there that were just like her. Well her blood was obviously different since she was his singer and her mind was silent to him.

Could that really though be it? Would he only stay with Bella because he couldn't read her mind? It must be relieving to not hear someones thoughts twenty-four-seven, but what about her blood? I wouldn't want to date a delicious chocolate cake, I would eat it. Simple as that, she thought to herself. She always felt proud of herself though, if she wouldn't...

Bella suddenly had a very ugly realization. Proud. But surely Edward wouldn't be that fucked up... She still had to consider it because it certainly wasn't normal to be this obsessive about something either.

So maybe Edward didn't love her. He loved her silent mind, the smell of her blood and his own restraint. Maybe he loved the fact that he could resist her blood and didn't eat her. He really couldn't find many girls with a silent mind and blood that boosted his ego in every corner. So when he found Bella with these qualities, but with a personality that he apparently didn't appreciate, he decided to change her into his dream mate.

It was a possibility but Bella didn't want to believe that everything that they were were a lie, at least on his part, because she did love him. She accepted his faults and appreciated his good sides. It seems that he couldn't - or didn't - do the same. It made her want to cry, but if her theory was true, he wouldn't shed a single tear for that bastard anymore.

Bella's phone vibrated again, but this time she didn't check the caller, she just answered it. She was certain that it was Edward.

"I told you to stop calling me!" She yelled loudly as she put the phone to her ear. Thank god Charlie wasn't home.

"Whoa! Okay, I don't remember that but okay, I'll hang up", came a very amused sounding voice from the phone. Voice that was not Edwards.

"No! Nononono. Sorry, Jasper. I thought that you were Edward", she explained and sighed. She was getting tired.

"I thought that you didn't answer his calls anymore", you could almost hear the frown in his voice.

"I didn't, I mean, I don't, but he used Rosalie's phone to call me".

"So that's why she was screaming at him", Jasper chuckled. The chuckle turned to a full laughter in a minute and Bella couldn't see why this was funny to him.

"I don't see how any of this is funny." She sure didn't think it was funny. Sure, it was reassuring to know that Edward got at least a little punishment for what he did - and a bit amusing, she admitted. Rosalie could be very scary when angry, but Edward was going a bit too far with this 'Bella obsession' of his, so she didn't see how this was a laughing matter. Who knew what he would do next?

"Oh come on, Bella, lighten up a little."

"Easy for you to say. Edward is practically stalking me and he isn't giving up. I'm almost at my wits end here!" Bella exclaimed. Maybe she should just move to Hawaii to escape Edward, it was too sunny for him to follow her there. Though knowing him, he would probably track her down and hire someone to follow her. It wasn't like he didn't have the money to do so.

"Oh, he'll give up soon enough. But before that happens, I'm gonna have fun looking at you guys", Jasper said and she could clearly hear the smile on his voice.

"Right, enjoy the show then, because I'm not talking to you anymore. Bye!" Bella said with a mock cheerful voice. She wasn't really going to hang up and they both knew it but she really was annoyed with him. Jasper knew that this was taking a toll of her recently so she couldn't understand why he was doing this to her.

"Wait, Bella, I'm sorry. Okay? Sorry. I know how tiring this is to you and I wasn't making fun of you or the situation. I promise. I was making fun of Eddy boy, he is getting really desperate and it's funny looking at him struggle. I didn't realize at first that I was making fun of you too, so I'm sorry, I won't do it again. I promise" She could tell that he was being sincere so she forgave him.

She sighed. She was really getting too cranky if she snapped at Jasper only after light teasing. "I know Jasper, and I'm sorry too. I'm just getting tires is all. I just hope that all of this would be over and I could go back to normal days when all I had to worry about was what dinner I would make for Charlie."

"I'm sorry darlin', but I think you can never go back to those days. You are involved in the vampire world and the only way out would be death", Jasper said with a regretful voice. Bella knew he felt bad that this happened to her because while he was never mean or cruel towards her like Rosalie had been, he was against her knowing about vampires. Jasper said that the Cullens had a vote, when Edward announced that she was his mate, whether or not Bella should be shared with their secret. Jasper and Rosalie were the only ones who said no. Rosalie because she thought Bella should have the right to live a normal human life - get married, have kids and all those human experiences - and Jasper because he was the only one who doubted her being Edwards mate. But no one listened the empath.

"I know. But I can hope right?" she answered with a sad smile that he couldn't see.

Jasper obviously had nothing to say to that because his end of the phone was silent. Yes, she could hope, but the disappointment would be that much greater when she realized finally that she could never have that normal life that every teenage girl complained about. She would do almost anything to have that boring life now that she knew what an exciting one felt like.

"Did you have something to ask me or was this just a social call?" Bella asked him when the silence was getting awkward and uncomfortable. And Jasper wasn't the type to call for the sake of talking, because while he was nice and a teaser when you got to know him, he was also silent and used his words wisely. He didn't speak if he had nothing say.

"Want to hang out with me tomorrow?" Jasper asked suddenly. Well that came out of nowhere, Bella though surprised.

"Uh, sure, I guess? No, wait, will Alice or Edward be there?" She asked. She didn't want to see them and while she was certain that Jasper understood that, Alice was his wife. She had to make sure.

"Of course not. Do I seem stupid to you?"

"Well, you did marry her so... You _sure_ you want me to answer that?" Bella asked teasingly.

"No. No, I don't", Jasper sighed.

Jasper had explained to her once that he and Alice were companions, not mates. Jasper needed a person in his life after being alone for so many years, so when Alice came and saved him from the newborn wars, she became his companion too. He married her because Alice wanted that and he saw nothing wrong with that, it was only a piece of paper. He wanted Alice to be happy and if planning a wedding and having an engagement ring on her finger made her happy, so be it. Jasper did love Alice, even now, but not nearly as much as people seemed to think. Plus, Jasper knew that while Alice too loved him to an extent, to Alice Jasper only seemed to be a way to make herself look good and others jealous - he was the God of War.

"Okay, then I'll only say that sure, I'll hang out with you", she said with a small smile on her face. "When and where?"

"Tomorrow after school, at my place. And no, I don't mean the Cullen residence, I mean my place"

"And where is this place of yours?"

"Getting impatient already? You'll have to wait until tomorrow to see it. See you tomorrow at school", Jasper said and hung up. Bella took the phone from her ear and looked at it before shrugging. She took notice that the battery was almost finished and stood up to put it on the recharger. Then she went back to lay on her bed.

That's Jasper for you. Mysterious and though he was usually polite, he never said goodbye before ending the call. He just hung up after he had said what he intended to say. The first time he did it to her, she had been a bit insulted and upset, but soon she learned that that was just what he did to everyone and it wasn't anything personal.

She wondered why Jasper wanted to 'hang out' with her. He most likely wanted to talk about something important, she decided. Jasper wasn't someone who just 'hang out' with anyone. When he was in a group, he was usually quiet and rarely commented on anything they talked about. He was definitely not shy or insecure on anything else, mind you. Jasper had a very powerful presence. Bella believed that because he had a voice that made you want to listen to him, Jasper decided to just stay quiet. He liked to stay low and not draw any attention to himself, even though the attention he got was almost always good.

Bella looked at the clock on her nigh table. Nine o'clock. She sighed and sat up again. She had a feeling that tomorrow was going to be long and tiring day so she decided to just grab a shower, eat and go to bed.

* * *

The morning came way too quickly for Bella's comfort. Her nerves were on haywire all night, telling her how this day was going to be bad, so she hadn't slept well. Now, at seven o'clock, she was grumpy and she just wanted to stay in bed. Screw school and screw the meeting with Jasper.

Bella knew, however, that she couldn't do that because Charlie would never allow her to skip school. She could fake sick, but then there was Jasper to think about. Jasper ever only contacted her if he really had something important to say, so she knew she had to go.

She let out a long, frustrated sigh, threw the blanket off of her and got out of bed. She grumbled and took lazy, tired steps towards the closet. From there she took clothes without thinking what they were or how well they would go together. The clothes happened to be black slim jeans, simple red top and dark gray hoody with a fluffy hood in it. They would do.

After she put clothes on she went to bathroom, did her business, brushed her teeth, combed her hair and put it on a ponytail. Then she went to kitchen and ate cereal for breakfast. After breakfast she checked her watch to see how much the time was. It was quarter to eight and it was about fifteen minute drive with her truck so it would be about eight o'clock when she would arrive at school if she left now. School stated half past eight, so she would have about half an hour before school started.

_Basically I could have slept thirty minutes more_, she thought to herself. _Well, no use crying over split milk._

She would drive to school and wait the thirty minutes there. She had nothing to do here and while there was little to do at school either, she hoped that maybe Emmett or Jasper or even Rosalie would be early too so she would even have someone to talk to, or listen to.

She put on her jacket, grabbed her keys and walked out of the door. Then she locked the door and hopped inside her truck. She put the radio on and reversed het truck to the road and started driving towards the school.

The drive was over quickly as Bella sang with whatever song came from the radio and tapped the rhythm with her hand on the steering wheel. She loved to sing and while she wouldn't consider her self amazing at it, she didn't think she was absolutely horrible either. Average perhaps, nice to listen to maybe? Well, it didn't matter. She sang for her own fun, not for anyone else's.

Soon Bella reached her destination and she drove to the schools parking lot. It seems I am not the first one here, she thought bitterly as she saw one shiny silver Volvo already parked there. She let out an annoyed cry and drove a bit farther from the school so she could avoid parking next to the damn Volvo.

After she parked her car and took her keys, Bella took a minute just sitting there silently, trying to calm her nerves. She was really feeling that today would be horrid. Be determined that today will be a good day, and it will be, that would be today's motto.

She let out a deep sigh and turned to grab her school bag when she heard someone knocking on her window. She jumped a little, startled, and whipped her head towards the drivers window. It was Alice. She waived at her with a huge smile on her face and then signed to Bella to come out. Bella rolled her eyes. Of course she was going to come out, she sure wasn't going to stay here all day. She turned to grab the bag that laid on the passenger seat. Then she put her hand on the door knob and groaned mentally, here we go.

Alice started talking immediately after she opened the door. Actually, Bella was surprised that Alice even let her open the door herself. Because god forbid that she was fast enough even in that.

"Hi, Bella! It's so good to see you again! We haven't talked in, like, forever! You didn't even return my or Edwards calls. Edward was so disappointed." _Oh, so Edward was, but not you?_ Bella thought bitterly. "I told him that he needed to relax. He affected all of us with his moping mood. Poor Jasper couldn't even stand to be near him! I was so..."

Bella blocked her out after that. She was sure Alice didn't have anything to say to her that was even a little bit important or interesting. She had heard all of this almost on daily basis when they were 'best friends'. She would talk how her weekend was, what she shopped online, in which stores she went to, how disappointed she was that Bella didn't come with her and blahblahblah. Recently there was also the topic how great boyfriend and brother and a friend Edward was. So Bella had long ago learned to tune Alice's voice down.

So instead of listening to the chilling bells that was Alice's voice, she listened to the nerves that were screaming at her and the instinct that she had learned to listen after she met vampires. Jasper always told her to listen to her instincts because they was almost always right. She had learned that to be true after she they had saved her life many times before. They also helped to understand her wolf a little better, because wolves relied on instincts.

But now her instinct were telling her that Alice had some ulterior motive behind her casual and talkative facade. Bella didn't understand why they were telling her that or how that was possible. Alice seemed like her usual self, though truth to be told, Bella had never been good at seeing behind peoples masks. She was naive like that, she almost always just believed what she was told and she usually never even put effort into seeing if a person was truthful or just full of shit.

"...so Edward was such a sweetheart. And speaking of Edward." Alice's voice reached her ears again. _Oh, here we go again_, Bella thought with a sigh. "I must apologize to you."

..._Huh_? Bella was dumbfounded. This was new. And entirely not plausible. Alice Cullen did _not_ apologize. She never even admitted that she made a mistake. And she usually didn't, with that future seeing gift she had. But those rare times that she did, she did not admit it and she surely didn't apologize for it. She usually just tried to cover the whole thing up and subtly put the blame on someone else.

And what was she even _talking_ about? Bella had no idea.

"Excuse me?" Bella asked carefully. Her voice sounded a little wary as she felt like Alice was a time bomb that was seconds away from blowing up.

"Could we talk in somewhere more private? There are some curious eyes and ears and, well, you know me", Alice said, looking a bit sheepish. And Bella did know Alice. And Alice wasn't acting like, well, Alice.

She looked around her to see if she was right and sure enough, the parking lot was almost full of cars and more were coming. There were both boys and girls looking at them and while they obviously tried to hide it, they weren't doing a very good job at it. Bella knew that the Cullens were a very wanted source of gossip. The kids around them were like leeches, they suck every little or big 'story' they could find and spread it around the school. It was amazing how the biggest secret was a secret at all.

Alice was someone who protected her reputation with fangs and claws. And Alice had a very good reputation through out the whole school. Everybody thought she was nice and she talked to people in the school. Bella knew that she wasn't trying to befriend any of them because she always kept a distance with every one of the others that were not named a Cullen or Bella. Alice just wanted a good reputation to herself. She didn't want to be named unsocial and rude. But Bella also knew that this was not because Alice was all nice and sunshine, it was for Alice was selfish and kept a mask that made her seem like a perfect person. Alice wanted everybody to love her, worship her. Alice truly seemed to think of herself as a God, the one that knew everything before it even happened.

Rosalie seemed like a saint after you got through Alice's mask and got to know what kind of person she really was.

So Bella understood that Alice would want to apologize somewhere where other people wouldn't hear it. But almost every fiber in Bella screamed at her that Alice had something else in mind. But Bella being Bella, she believed almost everything she was told, so she asked Alice to lead the way and Alice gave a huge smile, which showed teeth and so came more like a creepy smile than a bright and happy one.

Alice turned around towards the forest near by the school. Alice was more like jumping towards it than walking. _She never could walk normally,_ Bella thought, amused.

They kept walking until they were in the forest. They didn't walk deep into the forest. Just enough that they didn't see the school, or the student in there apparently, she thought when she turned to look towards the school to see how deeply into the forest they were. _And nobody saw them_, a little voice in Bella's head said. But Bella refused to believe that Alice would hurt her in any way. Sure, she might fool her, lie to her and do anything she could to get her back with Edward, but she wouldn't hurt her. Bella was absolutely certain of it.

"So you wanted to apologize for something?" Bella asked and turned towards where Alice was. Except she wasn't there. Bella blinked a couple of times before looking around her, wondering where she disappeared to. When Bella couldn't find her, she just huffed and turned to walk to the school again, wondering what kind of joke Alice was trying to pull, taking her to the forest edge and just leaving her there.

Bella had only managed to take one step towards the school when she got a scare of her life. When she felt a pair of cold arms on her waist and a cold breath on her neck, she almost jumped from her skin and yelped loudly. Then she heard a familiar voice chuckle and she got angry.

"Hello, love" Edward whispered into her neck, while still holding her on her waist.

Bella turned around and stepped out of Edwards arms, a bit surprised that Edward let her. She was seething silently in her mind. She now understood that this was what Alice was aiming for when she led Bella here. She tried, and succeeded, to get her alone with Edward. Bella hadn't been alone with her since the day she broke up with him. He would try to get her alone to talk to her but she made sure that there were always at least a couple of people around them. He had even tried to come to her room in the at night but the moment she saw him, she screamed, knowing that Charlie was a light sleeper. It wouldn't even take twenty seconds before her dad would come to her room with a shotgun on his hand. Edward had already gone and Bella just told his dad that she had a nightmare.

But now she was alone with Edward and even if she screamed here, nobody would hear. She was sure that Alice made certain that they were far enough that nobody would hear if she decided to scream.

_God that sounds creepy_, Bella thought with a shiver. She was almost certain that Edward wouldn't hurt her. After the incident in the school when Edward claimed that Bella was his, she wasn't sure that she knew the boy at all. So she wasn't certain what Edward would do now they were alone.

"Hi. Edward..." Bella replied awkwardly. She was tense and stiff. She felt like she had to be ready to run at any moment, though she wasn't stupid. Edward would be able to out run her every day with days head start. _Running would be futile waste of energy_, she thought and tried to relax her body. "I guess that you want to talk if you went through all this trouble to get me alone with you", she said, trying to sound calm and convince herself that that was all he wanted. To have a calm and mature talk. Maybe Edward would finally see reason after this talk?

_Don't get your hopes up_, she reminded herself.

"Yes. I wanted to talk to you and because all of this 'playing hard to get', I haven't been able to talk to you alone" Edward started and Bella cold tell that he had more to say but she needed to clear that one thing he said so that she could say that 'well, I tried'.

"I'm not trying to play hard to get, Edward. I'm trying to _break up _with you", Bella said with a clear and calm voice. There was absolutely no use in getting angry. That would only give Edward a reason to start 'correcting her behavior', as he liked to call it. She treated her like a goddamn puppy every time he did it. And he usually listened better when she talked calmly to him.

"Yes, yes, I understand," Edward said off handedly. _No, I really don't think you do_, she thought tiredly and had the sudden urge to slap herself in the forehead and sigh. "But I finally figured out what you wanted me to realize and what this break was about". He sounded so proud of himself that she almost pitied him. Because the way he talked, Bella was sure that he did not realize that she wanted to break up, let alone why she wanted to do so.

"Oh?" Bella asked with a tired, but interested voice. She truly wanted to hear what kind of stupid idea had popped into his head now. His ideas were usually completely laughable.

But there was a small hope inside Bella that flared the moment he said those words. Maybe, just maybe he finally will let her go. Maybe he will finally realize that she wanted to break up and see reason. Maybe he finally...

"You wanted to have sex", he said bluntly.

...Or not.

Bella blinked once, then twice, and then thrice. The words were like an unknown language to her and when she finally understood them, she didn't know what to say, so she just stared at him, her mouth a bit open, processing the words he just told him. Everything was completely silent and she felt like even the forest animals and birds stopped to gape and wonder about the stupidity of this vampire.

Maybe she heard him wrong? Yes, that had to be it. There just was no possible way that Edward was that stupid. Well, there was only one way to find out.

"Come again?" She said with a weak and disbelieving voice. _I heard him wrong, I heard him wrong, please let me have heard him wrong_, she pleaded silently. She cleared her throat and waited for the answer she already really knew the answer to.

"You wanted to have sex. Well still do, since I sincerely doubt you have had sex with anyone after we broke up" He said again. Or before it really, she thought helpfully. She was a virgin, though she didn't want to be, but there was no way she would just go and have sex with a random guy just so she could rid herself of her virginity. She wasn't cheap, just a bit desperate.

He sounded so sure of himself. He really thought that she would play hard to get so she could have sex? _What the hell is the logic in that?!_ She knew, there wasn't any! There was absolutely no logic in taking a break from your boyfriend so you could have sex with him! Unless, of course, he thought that she would have sex with someone else. But did he really have that low opinion of her? _He certainly was getting very desperate with coming up with reasons for this break up_, she thought, a bit hurt.

Bella had noticed that he was a bit slow with this break up thing, but this went beyond any and every reason there was. Bella was sure that that was just because he didn't want to believe that she wanted to break up with him. So denying the thing all together and coming up with these ridiculous things that she just wanted to take a break, was playing hard to get and so on were just his way of escaping reality. But this was just simply too much.

"But I figured a solution for that problem" Edward started talking again. _Wanting sex was a problem_? she wanted to yell at him. Wanting to have sex with your boyfriend was completely normal, but the boyfriend always blowing the girlfriend off was not normal. So, in Bellas point of view, _Edward_ was the one with a problem. "I've been working on my control and if we start slowly, I can have sex with you", Edward said with a proud smile on his face.

And having sex was apparently such a drag to him so...

Wait..

_What_?!

Edward took a couple of steps towards her and she was almost thanking gods that he was considerate enough to take them at human pace.

"Wait, wait, wait. Hold on a minute there! No, I don't want to have _sex_ with you!" Bella said while shaking her hands in front of her, trying to sign him to back off. Naturally, he didn't listen to her, but he did stop advancing towards her.

"What are you talking about? I remember clearly you always trying to push yourself on me", Edward said with confusion in his eyes and voice. It was like he truly didn't understand what she was talking about. _Well thanks so much for making me sound like a slut_, she thought with a frown but quickly took her head back at the game at hand. She needed to make Edward understand that they broke up and would never get back together again, because things didn't look so bright for her right now.

"Yes, well, we were dating then and we aren't anymore. I'm not trying to play hard to get or anything else Edward! I didn't want to take a 'let's-get-back-together-after-some-time' -kind of break. I wanted to, and still do want to, break up with you! Like 'let's-never-get-back-together-again' and 'let's-never-ever-ever-have-sex' kind of break up! We are _never_ having sex, we will _never_ kiss again, we will _never_ date again and we are never _ever_ **_ever_** getting married and living the happily ever after together. Okay?" Bella really needed him to understand all this. They weren't an item anymore, never really were. They had to go on their own separate ways and live their own lives.

Edward fell silent and just looked at her. His face was completely unreadable so she had no idea if he took what she said to heart. She hang on to that small shred of hope that he would listen to what she had said for once in his life and just turn away. But Edward wasn't known to listen to anyone else but Alice and sometimes Carlisle so she tried not to get her hopes too high up.

Then he was suddenly almost on her face with both of his upper arms in a very nearly painful grip. She winced slightly and squirmed a bit, silently telling him to loosen his grip, but he obviously wasn't watching his body language.

"I'm pretty sure that I can change your mind", Edward said with a husky voice. _Well at least he has made an improvement,_ she thought bitterly, now he finally seems to realize that I truly intend to break up with him.

She was just about to tell him how she was pretty sure that he could _not _change her mind when his lips came crashing to hers. She stilled in shock. She couldn't believe that Edward could do something like this. She made perfectly clear that anything like this was not welcome. She said in very clear english words that they were never going to kiss again. But she forgot her shock very quickly when she felt his tongue on her lips, trying to force its way through her lips. She clenched her teeth and lips together, not giving him any room to push that cold tongue in her mouth. Edward apparently didn't like how she responded because after that his grip on her arms became very painful. She gasped in pain and Edward took advantage of that immediately. His tongue was in her mouth and Bella gagged. She couldn't push him away because he still had that painful grip on her arms and when she tried to pull her head away, she felt a tree behind her. There was nowhere to go and this would only stop if Edward decided to stop.

When they were dating, he never even tried to kiss her like this. If he would have kissed her like this then, she would be responding very eagerly and almost jump from joy, but not anymore. Now she couldn't believe that she could ever want to do this with him at all. His tongue felt lifeless because it was so cold and hard. It was like sticking a metal bar in her mouth.

It felt like an eternity went by, but which was surely only about a minute, before he pulled away to let her breath. She gasped for breath like it was pure gold and was thankful for the oxygen. But it didn't take long for Edward to start leaning towards her again, intent very clear. No, not again, she panicked and moved her head so his lips came to her cheek instead. He growled lowly and pulled her hands so that he could grasp then both with only one hand. Then he grasped her chin and turned her face towards his. She clenched her eyes shut, willed herself not to cry and wished that she had just stayed in bed today.

There was a fierce growl behind her that caused her eyes to pop open. That growl was eerily familiar and she knew immediately to what, or who, that growl belonged to. A huge smile spread on her lips despite her current situation and position. Edward still had a firm grip on her hands and chin but his otherwise, his attention was elsewhere. He was looking behind her shoulder, at what she was sure was Silvery. The growl continued to come in a steady warning sound, ceasing just for a second to draw breath from time to time.

_He had come_. Silvery had come and he was right here! Bella was so excited that she completely forgot the situation she was in, the danger that was still gripping her arms in a death grip. Silvery also seemed to notice the grip because his growl got louder and louder. Bella came to her senses then, because she realized that Silvery was just a wolf, and Edward was a vampire that ate wolves, and other animals, almost daily. She grew scared and was just about to yell to Silvery to leave when the impossible happened.

Edward let her go.

He was also obviously wary of Silvery. After he let her arms go, he backed away slowly and held hands in front of him, palms in view, as if to say that he meant no harm. Bella was so dumbfounded of his behavior. Edward was a vampire! A vegetarian one, sure, but vampire none-the-less! Surely he didn't need to be scared of one normal wolf.

Which meant that her Silvery was not normal wolf. He couldn't be if he got Edward backing down in what seemed to be like fear. But first things first, she thought when she saw Silvery from the corner of her eye, she needed to diffuse this situation somehow because things could still turn very ugly. She turned her head a little to look at Silvery and was a bit frightened of what she saw. His lips were curled upwards to show the set of a white teeth, drool falling from his mouth. The very deadly and scary looking set of white teeth. Silvery looked just as beautiful and elegant as the first time she saw him, but right now he didn't look cute or, well, pet-able.

She knew very well that Silvery was in no way showing any aggression towards her, but towards Edward. Still, the small voice that warned every prey when they were near a predator, screamed at her to run. But that would be stupid even if she was the one in danger, because one should never run from a predator.

At this point Silvery had already advanced in front of her, still growling at Edward who had backed about five meters from them. Edward kept his eyes at Silvery at all times, not even glancing at Bella or anywhere else. He just kept backing away. After a few minutes of this tense atmosphere, Edward just bolted. Bella's human eyes and brain couldn't process the speed that Edward left with, so to Bella, Edward was there the first second and gone after the second one.

Silvery didn't even seem to be stunned about the speed. After Edward had gone, he stopped growling, smelled the air a bit and sneezed and snorted a couple of times, as if the smell was abusing his nose.

Bella hadn't moved at all from her position against the tree as she watched Silvery. Maybe she should have realized that he wasn't a normal wild wolf from the start. Silvery was very big, for one. She had never even read about a wolf nearly as big as Silvery. He was also way too intelligent to be considered a normal animal. He had eyes that showed that he understood everything he told her. But the final nail in the coffin was that Edward was afraid of him. And Edward would not be afraid of a normal animal. So maybe she really should have noticed that he was no normal wolf.

But if Edward - a vampire - had been afraid of Silvery, didn't that mean that Silvery was dangerous?

Silvery had stopped growling by then and was looking back at her with eyes that seemed to ask are you alright?

"Oh, Silvery", Bella wailed quietly and ran to him. When she reached him, she wrapped her hands around his neck and hugged him. _I don't care if you are normal or not,_ she decided, Silvery had saved her and he was her friend, normal or not. Besides, Bella herself wasn't very normal either. What kind of normal person would date and break up with a vampire and befriend a wolf? She laughed silently.

Suddenly when she was rubbing her face against Silverys rough but somehow very soft and warm fur, the reality of the situation she was just a minutes ago came crashing down on her. She started shaking and clutched the fur of her friend so tightly that she was sure that she was hurting him. But he let her do it. Maybe he realized that she needed this small comfort from him.

Bella couldn't believe that Edward would do something like that. But she wasn't scared of the kiss, no, she was afraid of what he would have done if Silvery hadn't come when he did. Would he have gone further? If so, how further would he have gone? He had talked about sex, but surely he wouldn't have raped her. Right? And certainly not in the forest. Right?

Bella truly wanted to believe that.

She didn't realize she was crying until Silvery started whining softly and nudged her shoulder with his nose. She just hugs him tighter and whispers that she's fine. Silvery continues whining and nudging her and she just tries to collect herself again. Crying does you no good, she thinks to herself, it just makes your eyes all read and swollen. _You're fine, you're safe_. She kept reminding herself of this and that combined with Silvery's woodsy scent soon calms her down.

When she feels that she is calm enough, she pulls her face away from his neck and looks him in the eyes. The amazing golden-yellow eyes stares right back at her with something akin to concern in them. She gave him a sad smile and kissed his nose. "I am fine", she said out loud this time, fully believing the words herself too. She was fine, now that Silvery was finally with her.

Silvery sniffed her a couple times. He seemed satisfied with what he smelled because he just gave one snort and looked away. Then he stepped away from her and turned to walk deeper into the woods. Bella made a move to follow him, but Silvery stopped her. He turned towards her again and pushed her towards the school with his muzzle. When she wouldn't move, he gave a short growl and pushed her with his paw instead. She stumbled a couple of steps backwards, but didn't fall. Satisfied that she had gotten the message, Silvery turned to leave again. Bella couldn't believe him.

"You're just gonna leave?" She asked him with disbelieving voice. She hadn't seen him in two months, and now that they met again, he would just leave after a couple of minutes? Hadn't he missed her at all?

Silvery had stopped walking but he didn't turn to look at her. He seemed to be fighting with himself, seeing how tense he was.

"Couldn't you just stay for a while? I haven't seen you in months... I miss you", she said, trying desperately to get him to stay, if only for a little while.

Silvery snorted and glanced at her. Then he shook his head and started to walk away again.

Bella stomped her foot and started yelling. "You are not going to just leave me here alone after that! You can't just leave me here after so much time! Haven't you missed me at all?"

His steps seemed to falter, but otherwise he seemed unaffected by her rant and just kept walking. Bella was angry but above that she was saddened beyond belief. She always believed that if Silvery and she ever met again, it would be a happy reunion. One filled with hugs and laughter. But it seemed that her childish dreams got in the way of reality again. This was awful.

"Fine. _Leave_! I hate you! I didn't want to see you again anyway! _Leave and never come back_!" She yelled at him. Then she turned away from him and sat on the cold forest ground. She was trying to hide her sadness with her anger so she wouldn't appear to be weak in the eyes of her strong wolf friend. She could feel the hot tears again welling up in her eyes, but she held them back. She wouldn't cry over something like this.

The only sound in the forest that Bella heard was her own breathing, until she heard the soft thumping sound behind her, indicating that someone - who Bella believed was Silvery - was walking towards her. She held her breath and waited to see what he would do. When he reached her, he just stayed behind her, doing nothing. Bella was still holding her breath.

Then Silvery let out a quiet whine and lowered his head from behind her between her breasts **(A/N: Okay, so this is nothing perverted or kinky or romantic, okay? I just didn't know any other way to write it in a way that was understandable or didn't sound stupid...)** and his large paw came to her stomach to pull her towards him, Bella was sure he was trying to hug her in his own wolfy way. She finally let out the breath she was holding and wrapped her hands around Silvery, hugging him back.

"You're an ass..." She said quietly. Silvery let out a bark that sounded like a laugh so Bella let out a small and teary sounding laugh too. Still, she smiled a happy smile. _You are my only true friend_, she thought as she hugged him a bit tighter.

* * *

**Hope you liked it! Please review and tell what you think! :)**


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